How To Flirt, Part 2 {For Guys}

Welcome to Part 2 of my mini-series on teaching you how to flirt!

And why you shouldn’t. :)

This post is directed more towards the guys…but girls, feel free to comment and share your thoughts!  You can find the Top 9 ways to flirt {for girls} HERE.  A lot of these points for guys are the same (or almost the same) as some of the ones for the girls.  Just goes to show you how easy it is for the opposite sex to flirt with each other. :P 

• Show off – physically.  Yeah, we want to see your muscles!

•  Always wear your shirt just a little unbuttoned.

•  Be the first to jump at an opportunity to help a them.

•  Pay them compliments – a lot.

•  Physical contact (especially hugs, touching hands, etc.)

•  Try to catch their eye…

•  And when you do, wink at them.

•  Follow them around and include yourself in their conversations.

•  Offer to teach them how to do something.

Ookay…haha

#1 – Guys, I know you like to show off.  Okay, that’s just a simple fact. :)  And a lot of us girls like to encourage you, but…showing off can be a form of flirting, and not a good one, at that.  We know it boosts your ego and it makes you feel…good, when a girl squeals at your six-pack (or the beginnings of one), or your bulging biceps, etc.  Look, it’s great to be in shape and stuff.  God made us to be healthy and exercise, etc.  But when you’re doing it for the wrong motives (with the intention of impressing girls)…well, it doesn’t make it as cool.

#2 – THIS is a great stumbling stone for us girls.  While guys are the more ‘visual’ and physical of the sexes (while girls are more emotional and verbal), girls still enjoy seeing masculine bodies.  (Like what we talked about in the above point)  Seeing a guy’s broad chest, can give a girl a little heart twist.  Even if your shirt is unbuttoned only two down, it’s still a temptation.  And this is one of the biggest forms of flirting, because especially if a guy knows what a girl likes to see, this can lead to other forms of flirting…

#3 – Okay, when you read this third point, you may have been like ‘What?  But I thought you girls like us helping you!’  Yes, we do!  We love it!  And it makes us feel so ladylike when a guy jumps out of his seat to help us take something heavy out to our car.  But dude, there are other guys around too, okay?  Especially when you like a girl, wanting to help her will be something that you jump at.  But…this can be one of the biggest turn-offs to a girl.  When a guy is constantly wanting to help her with something.  I know this has been one of the most frustrating circumstances that I’ve had before. :P  Try helping out another girl, every once in a while.  Don’t make your ‘likeness’ so obvious, and…try not to flirt with her while you’re taking her bag of books to the car.

#4 – Paying compliments…yeah, this can get annoying.  I once had a guy tell me that I looked ‘really nice today’, like FOUR times in one day.  Annoying.  And, like I said in the {for girls} post…this doesn’t mean that you should never pay a girl a compliment.  Girls LOVE hearing compliments from their guy friends!!  We really, really appreciate that you notice us. :)  But, just don’t go too far.  Be honest, and simple, and nice.  Don’t overdo it.

#5 – Guys are physical.  We know that you like feeling a girl’s fingers in between  yours…a girl laying her head on your shoulder…a girls arms around your neck.  But I’ve had more than one guy friend tell me that hugs are one of the biggest temptations to a guy and one that, very often, causes them to stumble.  That’s one reason why I am very careful HOW I’m hugging and WHO I’m hugging.  And guys…you should be too.  Personally, I like my guy friends to initiate the hugs, because I never want to put them in a situation where they are tempted to have impure thoughts.  If I guy decides to give me a two-armed hug, I’m fine with that…and I know that my heart is in the right place.  But if the GUY initiated it, only to have the good feeling of hugging me…he’s gonna have to deal with that before God.  So guys, I think it’s up to you and your convictions how you hug a girl…or if you even want to.  I’m good with a friendly handshake too. :)
And about touching hands…there are only a few circumstances that this is possible to do without making it obvious to everyone around you that you’re going steady with a girl. Haha  Just…be careful.

#6 – Try to catch their eye. Haha  You guys are so subtle. ;)  Yes, when a girl notices that a guy has been watching her, it can make the girl feel that he might have interest in her.  So please be careful how much you look at a girl. :P  If you are seriously interested in her, quit staring and go talk to her…or better yet, go talk to her dad. ;)

#7 – Huh!  REALLY want to show a girl that you’re interested in her?  Wink when you catch her eye.  But, actually, don’t.

#8 – Okay…I have had a personal experience where a guy followed me around…everywhere.  Okay, he might be a pretty nice guy, but I had absolutely NO interest in him AND he was kind of freaky.  Like, he always seemed to want to know where I was, what I was doing, who I was talking with, what I was eating… :P  Okay, it got really annoying.  Finally, I just asked Noah to have a talk with him, and he kinda left me alone after that.  But oh my word, that was super, super frustrating!  So guys, if you like a girl, don’t follow her around.  That is one of the biggest ways to flirt and it gets irritating after a while…for the girl.

#9 – Okay, okay, another point that I need to make clear!!  This doesn’t mean that you can’t teach a girl something.  Honestly, I think it’s really romantic if a guy teaches a girl piano or guitar or violin…or how to shoot a gun.  (haha that just brought a movie scene into my head ;)  Okay, anyway, I think that’s really cute…BUT it totally depends on WHAT it is you’re teaching them.  I had a guy offer to teach me ballroom dancing once, and I was like ‘sure!’.  Uh…but like five steps into the ‘lesson’, I said that I needed to go.  Nope, ballroom dancing with that guy didn’t work out.  Just be careful on WHAT you’re teaching a girl and WHY.

Okay, sorry if you felt like I was preaching a sermon at you. :P  Hope those points were insightful, though!  Stay strong, brothers!

Also…I was thinking of making a Part 3.  On ‘good flirting’.  Wanna know what I mean?  Comment and tell me to write Part 3 ;)

And guys, I will leave you with the same verse that I wrote in, in the girls’ post:

‘I want you to swear, O [Sons] of Jerusalem, do not arouse or awaken my love until she pleases.’

~Song of Solomon 8:4